A little over a year ago, a Post (link below) was published. It focused on the unexpected loss of a dear friend.
Yesterday (Monday), I received a phone call from my daughter who lives on our west coast. “Dad ….. Helen died.”
Helen and Benny were married for around 40 years and so, not surprisingly, living without Benny became a significant challenge however, she did seem to be coping as well as could be expected.
When I was over there last Fall, Helen and I had lunch together and generally talked about her circumstances, and life in general. We had another lunch date planned in a few weeks time.
When we were out walking Ray today, we stopped at a Tim Horton’s and sat outside sipping rather hot lattes. I was watching the traffic; the people across the road; the people going in/out of Tim’s; in fact I was watching the world go by. Nobody had any idea what was on my mind as they went about their day. Helen had only just recently died, but so had so many other people. They could have died in an accident; by an act of aggression; from a terminal illness, or from simply aging.
It seems to me that we have created a kind of insulated society, in that people are dying all the time, but life just goes on for most people as if nothing had happened … which of course was quite correct within their personal worlds.
There are no revelations here, except that when I want to scream out to the world “Stop and listen … Helen just died”, I know that it would have little impact for hopefully obvious reasons. It seems somehow wrong that the world can continue as if nothing had happened,when so many people are dealing with personal loss.
What was I doing a few months ago when a boat load of refugees capsized in the Mediterranean and so many were drowned? What was I doing when the parents of school children killed in a mass shooting were trying to come to terms with the fact that their child would not be coming home ever again?
While these ramblings merely confirm a simple fact of life, it does seem somehow wrong that everybody lives their life as per normal, even though some of our fellow humans are struggling to process a personal loss.
R.I.P. Helen. You will be remembered for so many reasons (all good!), but I wish you could have stayed around a bit longer. I miss you already.