“Bob and Bob” – Part 1

This is a special treat … a complete section (albeit in two parts) from an adventure in “The Odessa Chronicles.”

Our intrepid adventurers are riding out  a storm in a small boat when two seagulls are thrown up against the cabin windows. The man-servant braved the elements to rescue them …

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The man-servant had put the seagulls on the dashboard, in front of the steering wheel, so that he could talk to them while steering the Argo. They were both standing there staring at him now. “Well, guys,” started the man-servant, “welcome to the Argo. I am known as the man-servant, and the Barn Owl next to me is Odessa. You can see Dewey, the cat, half-asleep on the chair over there, and this odd creature on my left is Jaxon, a Jackalope. Who are you?”

The seagulls continued to stare. Odessa decided to help out. “I realize that you and I have little in common, in fact we have nothing in common, but we can all understand each other here, so it would really help if we knew your names. How about it?”

One seagull looked directly at Odessa. “I’m Bob!”

The man-servant looked at the gull. “Bob?” he said. “Your name is Bob?”

Odessa turned to the man-servant. “You know … sometimes you really are part of the problem rather than part of the solution. What part of ‘I’m Bob’ did you not understand?”

“I’m sorry,” said the man-servant, “but Bob is not a seagull kind of name. I mean, have you ever heard of a seagull named Bob before?”

Odessa looked at him with unblinking eyes. “Had you ever heard of a Barn Owl named Odessa before you met me?”

Odessa turned to the other gull. “And what is your name?”

The other gull looked her straight in the eyes and said, “My name is Bob!”

Jaxon was trying to control a desire to burst out laughing when the man-servant turned to him. “What’s so funny, Jaxon?”

Jaxon looked at the man-servant and totally disintegrated into uncontrollable laughter. “Your face was priceless when you realized that they were both named Bob.”

“Jaxon,” said the man-servant, “we are in the middle of a bad storm and need to keep things organized in here. How are we going to communicate properly with these two having the same name? I think that we should call them Bob One and Bob Two. That should work.”

One of the gulls hopped onto the edge of the steering wheel and faced the man-servant. “Which one of us is Bob One, and which one is Bob Two, and how do we address Bob Three?”

The man-servant was looking puzzled. “Is there another Bob coming to join us?” he asked, really hoping that the answer would be no.

“No!” said the gull. “That could really get complicated then, couldn’t it?”

The man-servant thought for a moment, and then turning to Odessa, said, “Am I not understanding something here? Does this dialogue make sense to you?”

Odessa smiled. “Man-Servant,” she said, “you have to accept that these are two seagulls. They don’t think like any other creature I know.”

Jaxon then added. “Man-Servant, seagulls are an oddity of the seas and oceans. They think in very simple terms.”

“Okay! Thank you, guys.” He then turned to the gull on the steering wheel. “Would you like to be Bob One or Bob Two?”

The gull, without any hesitation, said, “Bob One!”

The other gull jumped up onto the steering wheel. “I want to be Bob One!” he said.

“Well, you can’t, because I was asked first!” interjected the first gull.

“Perhaps we could name you Bob Three?” said the man-servant.

The first gull was shaking his head in despair. “Why would you want Bob One, Bob Two, Bob Three and Bob Four? You really do like confusion don’t you.”

The man-servant was scratching his head. “How did Bob Four get into the conversation?”

Bob One looked at the man-servant. “You really have some difficulty with simple logic, don’t you? If you want to talk to me, which Bob do you call?”

“Bob Two?” asked the man-servant, very confused now.

“Very close. Good try … but wrong. I am Bob One.”

“But you both kind of look the same to me,” said the man-servant. “In fact, you all look the same to me.”

Bob One looked down at his feet, and then at the man-servant. “Would it surprise you to know that you humans all look the same to us?”

The man-servant turned to Odessa and Jaxon. “Can one of you help me out here? I am really having trouble talking with Bob One and Bob Two.”

Odessa grinned. “Stay with it, Man-Servant. It will be a good learning experience for you.”

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…. to be continued tomorrow!

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